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Desktop Confessional

I Think I'm Paranoid.

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

I've just come to discover that I am a hypochondriac.

I always knew there was a problem with the way I was obsessed with every little ache in my body, and if there was a time that I would fall ill more usual than often, I'll get panic attacks wondering if it could be something bigger than just the flu.

A lot of it comes with being very aware and sensitized to the sorts of diseases that are becoming more common in our world. Breast cancer, AIDS, dengue, etc etc. You name it, I've probably researched its symptoms .. just in case it persisted within me and I could react quicker and seek medical help. I'm so weird yet self-dependant that way.

This month my hypochondria has been going into overdrive. I've had the fever twice, but luckily enough it went away after a good night's sleep. The cough that came along with the fever is still annoying me, but after forcing hot drinks (I hate hot drinks) and copious amounts of Fisherman's Friend into my system, I'm glad to say its going away.

Other than that, I blogged previously about my toe being sprained. Now I never knew HOW exactly I got my toe sprained. I suspected that it was because I was wearing uncomfortable shoes whilst walking around like a hero around Jalan Alor and Tengkat Tong Shin for 45 whole minutes. But my dad had to scare me by saying it could be gout. Don't say that to a hypochondriac! He has gout (ya lah forever eating meat), and it's hereditary so I was sooo afraid I somehow got it, despite my relatively normal meat consumption patterns.

Needless to say, my doctor totally laughed at me when I hobbled to her clinic and screamed that I had gout and I was barely 21.

My current obsession is breast cancer. I found a small little lump in my left breast that wasn't there before, and I freaked out about it. I went to my doctor (yet again! We're best friends!) and apparently, all breasts are lumpy and its not accurate to check for lumps when your period is due. I asked Meesh, who had a benign lump removed, about it and she concurred. I forced her to feel my lump, and she laughed at me too because it was tiny. Plus the fact that I don't have a family history, or smoke or drink (that often) probably meant I was worried about nothing. Again.

All these fears, and I've never even been hospitalized.

Digressing, but Meesh and I think Black Eyed Peas "My Humps" is going to be so good for a breast cancer campaign.

Lumps are no song and dance. See a doctor today.

Remember that you read that here first.

So the conclusion of this long-winded tirade is that I am a paranoid little girl. And that my doctor makes her living out of me. And that the Black Eyed Peas is a very socially conscious and aware group who don't get enough love from NGOs.

  1. Blogger simonsta said:

    yeah you've been accussing me of being with ash too ... totally paranoia babes

  1. Blogger Anil P said:

    It merely shows how much you love life, and living. :)

  1. Blogger ButterRoll_sama said:

    i'm more worried about getting killed by irony. testicular cancer? bah humbug!

  1. Anonymous Anonymous said:

    How do you force someone to feel your lump anyway? "FEEL MY LUMP! FEEL MY LUMP!!!"



  1. Blogger Kaki Cucuk Langit said:

    now i can't get that stooopid song out of my head. i need richard cheese now!!!!!!

  1. Blogger Nadiah said:

    And I thought I was bad!

    Also, that song is utterly annoying and it has now taken up residence in my head. Woe.

  1. Blogger sarah said:

    simon: ash is not paranoia, lolololove.

    anil: thats a good way of looking at it :)

    butterroll: haha well at least i dont have to worry abt testicular cancer.

    kawa: in total seriousness, i asked her exactly like that.

    naz: hahaha well go deal with its infectiousness.

    nadiah: i'm sorry!

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  1. Blogger achamka said:

    Here's a useful resources on fourteen simple things on breast cancer worth a look: http://breast-cancer1.com/

  1. Anonymous Anonymous said:

    best regards, nice info
    » » »

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