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Desktop Confessional

Wrong side of the bed.

Friday, June 04, 2004

Sometimes, you wake up and you know today's going to be bad, if not slightly dampening to your spirits.

It has nothing to do with an upcoming appointment that you want to avoid, or the fact that you'll have to clean the house later. It doesn't even have to do with you not getting enough sleep last night, nor the idea of it being Friday and you, once again, have no plans whatsoever for the day and the night.

It has to do with waking up and feeling like you don't have a direction. It's about waking up, and having all your insecurities suddenly attack you. It's like an unbearable sense of realization about how things really are in your life. It is seeing things in plain view and factually, without always painting on the pretty glossy color to make yourself feel better.

It's about seeing, understanding, and accepting without resistance. The part that I understand all of this is especially heart-breaking because there isn't any hate or contempt involved. This is how the cards have been dealt, and I am okay with that- just do the best with what I have in my hand.

And I suppose that's how I'm going to take on this day: just making the best out of it until I go to sleep, and wake up to a brand new day.

Life is beautiful. It doesn't suck.

(Where are my friends when I need to talk?)

  1. Anonymous Anonymous said:

    its all a farce

  1. Blogger sarah said:

    What's a farce?

  1. Blogger Cayce said:

    Life? (I'm guessing - am not the anonymous poster above)

  1. Blogger sarah said:

    Farce is:
    farce ( P ) Pronunciation Key (färs)

    1. A light dramatic work in which highly improbable plot situations, exaggerated characters, and often slapstick elements are used for humorous effect.
    2. The branch of literature constituting such works.
    3. The broad or spirited humor characteristic of such works.
    2. A ludicrous, empty show; a mockery: The fixed election was a farce.
    3. A seasoned stuffing, as for roasted turkey.

    Hmm. Could be but i wouldnt want to think so.

  1. Blogger graceshu said:

    soz. the anonymous poster was me. yeah. was referring to "life is beautiful" as a farce. forgive me was feeling rather bitter when i read / wrote that ;)

    but admittedly, if your life is beautiful, be thankful.

    i'm glad for you anyway ;D

  1. Blogger sarah said:

    Grace: nah no problem la :) hope whatever that was bitter for you is alright now.

  1. Blogger ryuu said:

    grace is everywhere, huh, gracie ;)

    yeah life is beautiful is a farce, coz u'll never taste the joy before u endure the bitterness.

    but that's assuming u actually survive the bitterness.


  1. Blogger sarah said:

    ryuu: thinking abt the good things help :) i don't think i'm bitter now at all.

    (well. check back with me around 3am-ish :p bitter cos i cant sleep)

  1. Blogger ryuu said:

    so, were u bitter? :)

  1. Blogger sarah said:

    yeah! i'm bitter now- 230am and STARVING!

    bitter bitter bitter. need sleep!

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