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QUESARAH

Desktop Confessional

Loneliness is bliss

Wednesday, July 09, 2003

Aww bless. I love it when I am alone in my house. No one to squabble with over bathrooms (read: brother), no one to nag me about the unwashed dishes in the sink (read: mother and they are not my dishes), no one asking me to play Bob the Builder with him (read: father came back with Ikea stuff yesterday, had to help install the shelves with him). It's just me alone in the most comfortable place in the world with my music playing out clearly. When the house's filled with the 3 other (haha) people, the noises mix and mingle until it becomes something so completely annoying and grating that it really should be considered as noise pollution.

My dad with his oldies that can sometimes drive me up the wall (you know the song 'Downtown'? He put it on repeat mode last week) or the incessant shrill noise a power drill makes that resembles one of an ambulance siren.
My brother with his metal/hardcore/industrial music (eg Glassjaw) pounding behind the green (a dark shade of green. Not very nice, clashes with the rest of the rooms' doors as they are white) door of his room.
Me in my room, trying so hard to listen to the soft wails of Coldplay or Mayer, or trying to locate the beats of a hiphop song so I can 'bounce with it' (LOL).
My mom downstairs with the TV on at a considerably high volume because she can't hear anything with the noise upstairs.

It really is a mess during the weekends. There's just too much activity and energy in the house, kinda suffocating really. Everyone's in and out and minding their own business but unconsciously stepping on everyone's toes at the same time. It's a mixed blessing I guess- everything feels chaotic but calm at the same time. Calm because somehow you feel secure. Make any sense?

However, I can't wail til the day I go overseas, away from security. I can't wait for the day I start getting pangs of home-sickness. Simply cannot wait til the day I begin to miss the chaos and noise pollution, and start downloading the song 'Downtown'. Woohoo. Just a few more years.

Note: Britney Spears has admitted she is not a virgin. Hahahaha. I find this fact extremely funny. I think no one really believed her when she said she was. Maybe with the exception of twelve year olds. I don't know. The news is all over the Net- Yahoo, Netscape. Shows how much power she has although she is a so-so singer (amazing entertainer though). Apparently, she also smokes and drinks- woohoo, you go girl. It's time you broke free from your (fabricated) squeaky clean image. SHE HAS ALSO ADMITTED TO KISSING COLIN FARRELL. AUGH! There's no fucking justice in this world. *grumbles* She gets to shag Justin Timberlake (yes, I do think he is one hottie) and kiss Mr Farrell. And Charlize Theron is with Stuart Townsend.

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