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Desktop Confessional

Friday, June 20, 2003

Fri Jun 20, 12.14am

It feels like human beings are always placed in front of forked roads; forever challenged with either A .. or B.
We make decisions everyday, and everyday these decisions give us much to stress about. Even the simple decision of where to eat for lunch causes tiny little conflicts within groups because of either a)financial differences b)weird cravings (for me it's always asam laksa. Gah!) or c)being agreeable (you know.. Question:"Hey, where do you wanna eat?" ... Answer:"Anything")

I hate making decisions. They always make me twitch and twiddle my thumbs. Like, when the PMR results came out- I had to choose wether I should be in a Science or Arts class (I chose Science-huge mistake). A month after SPM- I had to choose what I wanted to do with my bleak future. Then, after choosing Mass Communication, I had to choose which college to attend. After choosing Taylor's, I had to choose my major.

And there is where today's problem comes in.

I chose Advertising (I originally wanted broadcasting, but it was not offered) mainly because I thought it was a cool thing to do. Creating advertisments that will (hopefully) influence consumers to go out there and get the product- it sounded so interesting to me. Imagine: you shape trends.

That was 6 months ago. Today... my fickleness comes back. I wonder if I would be good in advertising, although I have an interest in it. I mean, when I major in it, I will have to do a lot of computer work. I can't even manage my blog properly- how can I EVER create advertisments/graphics/etc? It sounds so unlikely. Which makes me wonder: maybe I should take journalism instead...

I like writing. I really do. I used to write a lot until I was struck by the disease: Writer's Block. (I've been blocked for at least a year now. During that length I have not written anything- not one story, not one article, not one poem. ) However, I don't like reporting- feels like being a secretary. I guess my passion (if that is what it is) lies in feature writing, writing articles about people and their lives... being some sort of untrained sociologist. I love people.. I like knowing people. It seems so ideal (to me) to write about PEOPLE. PEOPLE is a subject that will never be outdated because PEOPLE are constantly changing and evolving. Plus, PEOPLE are usually nosy/busybody/intrusive, so PEOPLE will always want to read about other PEOPLE.

Okay. I've completely lost my point. I guess what I'm trying to say is..
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood
And sorry I could not travel both
(Heh, there's some good ol' Form4 Robert Frost!!)

Indeed. Why can't we choose A and B? Why are we always limited?

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